Do you have a rebellious child? Feeling a bit like God dealing with the unending complaints and problems the Israelites grumbled about in the desert? A rebelling child is nothing new but some of our knowledge into why they are rebellious is. As christian parents we know that we need to train up our children to obey and follow the Lord’s teachings. When our child rebels is it a matter of the heart always? How do we know if it is a will based problem or a bio-medical problem?
We need to delineate the difference between a child that is willfully being rebellious and a child that is bio-medically being pushed towards a rebellious stance.
Rebellion in the Bible sprouts from a deliberate dismissal of God (Gen 3 Adam and Eve deliberately chose to go against God), or God’s representative (2Sam 15-18 Absalom rebelled against David God’s appointed king). So you don’t forget you the parent are His representative for the family, father and mother! The rebellion you see again and again in the Bible comes from the arrogance, and pride that started with Satan, through Adam, and on through the ages. These people chose to move against God and were disciplined for it. This is a spirit of rebellion.
A child with a bio-medical reason for rebellion is not willfully moving against God. This is a child that may need medicine to help regulate their severe moods. They may have brain damage from a chromosomal disorder or stroke. You need to treat the medical causes while you are reaching their heart. I do think you should have an open honest conversation with your child talking about their difficulties. You must not allow a disorder to become an excuse to you or your child. You need to also be aware that a bio-medical leaning towards rebellion may cross the line into a heart issue.
Sign of a Rebellious Spirit:
Proverbs 10:8 NIV
The wise in heart accept commands, but a chattering fool comes to ruin
Does your child accept your direction and teachings?
Proverbs 8:13 NIV
To fear the LORD is to hate evil; I hate pride and arrogance, evil behavior and perverse speech
Is you child prideful with an arrogant manner?
Do they behave in a manner that is “perverse” or “evil”?
Thankfully my friends the vast majority of our children do not act in this manner! We are in a wonderful position to acknowledge some of our children’s weaknesses that could lead to a full rebellion against God. I believe that this is one of the reasons many of our children leave the church in early adulthood. The seeds of rebellion that are dismissed or not weeded out, sprout into an adult that believes they know better than the Lord. This is the path of fools, one I pray that my children will not take.
Today we discussed how the Lord views rebellion and a rebellious spirit. In the coming days we are going to be talking more about how to get through to your child’s heart. How to deal with the medical problems that make reaching our children so difficult. Take heart the Lord hears your prayers for you child and I believe that he will open a way for you to help calm your child’s heart and see them grow into a wonderful christian!
Theneffzoo says
Excellent! and very true. So many parenting books and common recommendations for parenting don’t take into account the special needs or psychiatrically-ill child. It is so frustrating as a parent to find good advice for dealing with behavior that is not simply normal-human-kid rebellion. You have to look for what is at the root of the behavior. God looks at the heart and we should, too.